I knew I wanted to write a blog about what I've been learning about the idea of "covering". So, I did what any child of the Information Age would do... I looked it up online. Here are some favorites:
"something laid over or wrapped around a thing, especially for concealment, protection, or warmth"
" to serve as a substitute for someone who is absent"
"to hide the wrongful or embarrassing action of another by providing an alibi or acting in the other's place"
"anything that veils, screens, or shuts from sight"
"to cover completely; enfold. to keep secret; conceal"
I tried to look it up in a Bible dictionary to an epic fail. Oh well. :-)
Let me back up and explain a bit of my story. I grew up Southern Baptist. At the same time, I grew up with parents who told me I could do anything I set my mind to and that I could do almost anything a man could do. I'm so thankful for parents who raised me to be independent. Somehow, this all got confused in my head. How was I, an independent woman who didn't need a man, supposed to submit some day to a husband? Did that mean I gave up everything and became a June Cleaver at mercy to the wills and whims of my husband? I knew that was most assuredly NOT me. As with a lot of things I don't understand, I decided to shelf it until later... whenever I really NEEDED to figure it out.
Enter my only adult boyfriend. In dating him, I realized I had probably better start to get a grasp on this whole submission thing. By this point I had figured out that I did not have to be a doormat. Okay, if I'm not a doormat what am I? Add to that my boyfriend's love/hate relationship with the fact I didn't need a man. I can't tell you the number of times I heard that I was "too independent". After we broke up, I started asking the Lord if I really was too independent. I felt like He said, "Leah, it's not that you're too independent. You just couldn't trust [insert boyfriend's name here] with your heart". Enter sigh of relief. Okay, so submission has something to do with trust.
Fast forward four (wow, it's really been that long?!) years to last weekend. Again submission is coming up. A couple of weeks ago, I was at an event and I saw this man from my church. We didn't know each others' names. The only thing I knew was that within my two interactions with this man, I felt incredibly loved and covered. Hm. Covered. The next day I saw another man at my church and realized the same thing- he most assuredly did not know my name. Yet every time I see him, I feel incredibly loved, valued, and covered by him. When I told both men, they acted as if it was the best compliment I could ever give them. I was walking back to my seat when I felt like the Lord said, "Leah, you were made to be covered". What? Then it seemed to click. I, as a woman, have it written into my DNA to be covered (in the safe and proper way) by a man/men. Yes, the world has taken this and distorted it, as it has done with most godly principles. Being covered meant that someone else was at least partially responsible for protecting me. As women, we like to feel safe. It seems men, at least the godly ones, like making us feel safe. Duh. Making us feel safe is as much in their DNA as it is in our DNA to be covered.
I've finally realized that I can value covering without being a doormat. It all comes back to trust. Stay tuned for the next installment in covering... and eventually some musings on trust.
"something laid over or wrapped around a thing, especially for concealment, protection, or warmth"
" to serve as a substitute for someone who is absent"
"to hide the wrongful or embarrassing action of another by providing an alibi or acting in the other's place"
"anything that veils, screens, or shuts from sight"
"to cover completely; enfold. to keep secret; conceal"
I tried to look it up in a Bible dictionary to an epic fail. Oh well. :-)
Let me back up and explain a bit of my story. I grew up Southern Baptist. At the same time, I grew up with parents who told me I could do anything I set my mind to and that I could do almost anything a man could do. I'm so thankful for parents who raised me to be independent. Somehow, this all got confused in my head. How was I, an independent woman who didn't need a man, supposed to submit some day to a husband? Did that mean I gave up everything and became a June Cleaver at mercy to the wills and whims of my husband? I knew that was most assuredly NOT me. As with a lot of things I don't understand, I decided to shelf it until later... whenever I really NEEDED to figure it out.
Enter my only adult boyfriend. In dating him, I realized I had probably better start to get a grasp on this whole submission thing. By this point I had figured out that I did not have to be a doormat. Okay, if I'm not a doormat what am I? Add to that my boyfriend's love/hate relationship with the fact I didn't need a man. I can't tell you the number of times I heard that I was "too independent". After we broke up, I started asking the Lord if I really was too independent. I felt like He said, "Leah, it's not that you're too independent. You just couldn't trust [insert boyfriend's name here] with your heart". Enter sigh of relief. Okay, so submission has something to do with trust.
Fast forward four (wow, it's really been that long?!) years to last weekend. Again submission is coming up. A couple of weeks ago, I was at an event and I saw this man from my church. We didn't know each others' names. The only thing I knew was that within my two interactions with this man, I felt incredibly loved and covered. Hm. Covered. The next day I saw another man at my church and realized the same thing- he most assuredly did not know my name. Yet every time I see him, I feel incredibly loved, valued, and covered by him. When I told both men, they acted as if it was the best compliment I could ever give them. I was walking back to my seat when I felt like the Lord said, "Leah, you were made to be covered". What? Then it seemed to click. I, as a woman, have it written into my DNA to be covered (in the safe and proper way) by a man/men. Yes, the world has taken this and distorted it, as it has done with most godly principles. Being covered meant that someone else was at least partially responsible for protecting me. As women, we like to feel safe. It seems men, at least the godly ones, like making us feel safe. Duh. Making us feel safe is as much in their DNA as it is in our DNA to be covered.
I've finally realized that I can value covering without being a doormat. It all comes back to trust. Stay tuned for the next installment in covering... and eventually some musings on trust.
