Saturday, May 12, 2012

My Mom

Okay, so, I was reading a post on my friend Michelle's (yes, the one the post below is about) blog.  It was a letter to her mom.  It was incredibly sweet.  I loved being able to read it and read what she loves about her mom.  I also think it's so honoring.  So, since I consider copying to be the highest form of flattery, I'm writing a post about my mom.  Sorry, Mom, it's not a letter.

Let me tell you a bit about my mom and where she comes from.  My mom grew up on a fruit orchard in Mt. Hood, Oregon.  Her family didn't have a lot of money, so they canned and "put away" all sorts of fruits and vegetables.  When she was a kid, her dad was diagnosed with cancer.  Early in her teenage years (sorry, Mom, can't remember how old you were- like 14?), her dad died.  My mom left beautiful Mt. Hood (I've seen it- it's breathtaking) and arrived in flat, dead-looking Oklahoma during the winter.. the WORST time to be introduced to our state.  She helped her mom raise her 3 younger brothers.  When she was in college (I think), my mom was in a car crash that killed one brother and her grandmother and almost killed her mom.  During college, my mom went home on the weekends and helped her mom with all sorts of chores.  Why?  Because that's what family does.  I tell you all of this so you understand that my mom is one of the strongest women that I know.  These experiences would have broken many women or made them bitter.  Not my mom.

Fast forward to me.  The woman endured something like 36 hours of labor (with no epidural) and a C-Section (two weeks after my due date) just to bring me into the world.  (For the record, my parents had already decided to only have two children... it wasn't a decision based on how miserable the experience of bringing me into the world was).  Some women act or feel as if their children owe them something.  My mom NEVER acted as if I owed her anything.  When I think about my childhood, it is filled with memories of my mom.  I don't think the woman ever missed a school performance, Little League game, or church activity.  She carted me all over kingdom come.  She also put up with a rather.. curious.. child.  My mom taught me to dream.  To this day, she will tell you how she didn't give me coloring sheets as a child because she read "they inhibit creativity".  She gave me paper and crayons.  She read me probably thousands of books.  I can't tell you the number of "ideas" I had and told her about.  Whenever I told her about them, she listened- she didn't squash my little dreams- even when they entailed having 8 sets of twins as my children.

My mom has inconvenienced herself more times than I care to imagine for me.  Really, the woman taught me what sacrifice is.  I can't remember the last time she had both my sister and I home for Mother's Day.  Normally, she was with us because she was moving me out of college.  The ONE time I moved without my mom helping me?  She'd had major back surgery 2 weeks before and felt guilty about not being able to help.  The woman has spent the majority of her Christmas/birthday money taking my sister and I on trips.  She's lived on a much tighter budget so she could help me get my Master's.  For a long time, I thought that's what every family did- you sacrifice when someone else needs something.

I'm realizing how incredibly weird my family is.  My mom cooked dinner most nights out of the week.  Like, legitimately cooked.  Even when finances were tight, my sister and I felt UBER celebrated on our birthdays. (Yup friends, she's the one you can thank for teaching me that birthdays are a BIG deal). From the night I graduated high school, I am quoted in the local newspaper as saying I would miss my mom making me toast every morning.  Because my mom made me breakfast every.single.morning.  Even now, she spends her breaks coming down and helping my sister and I.  No matter what, I always know my mom will be there for me when I need her.  I know she would drop everything to be with me if I needed her.  The woman updated her own passport when I went to Morocco to make sure she could be there if I needed her.  Because of her, I also know that I can call my sister in the middle of the night and ask her for Sprite when I'm sick and she'll bring it to me.  My parents always said family comes first.

One last thing.  I'm so thankful for a mom who believes in me and is always for me.  When my dad died, my mom assured my sister and I we would make it.  She was always sympathetic and let us cry to our hearts' content, but she made sure we knew we would make it.  When I thought there was no way I could make it through school, she assured me I was smart enough to do it.  When I was scared, she calmed my fears.

Thanks, Mom, for everything you've done for me.  Thanks for every sleepless night, dollar you spent on me instead of yourself, every inconvenience, and for not losing patience with me.  Thank you for being the person who will always pick up and who's always glad to hear my voice.  Thanks for loving me, even when I'm a flake and forget to call you back the night before Mother's Day.  Thanks for being the "weird" mom; thanks for sacrificing and teaching me how to be a better human being.  I love you more than words (or a really long blog post) could ever say.

~Leah

P.S. Does this make me your favorite?  ;-)

Michelle the Brave

In an hour, it will be Mother's Day.  My goal is to write a post about my Mom, because she really is wonderful.  However, right now, I'm writing about something (okay, someone) that's been on my heart.  I'm writing about Michelle.

I really couldn't tell you when I met Michelle.  Her name was one of those that seemed to float around me for many months before I met her.  I kept hearing about Kevin and Michelle Leach.  I swear, the girl was everywhere.  It's funny because I also remember this very clear picture of seeing Michelle and Kevin before I had any idea who she was.  I'm guessing I really got to know Michelle after I started leading a Lifegroup.  I watched her from afar.  I've told her this before- I thought Michelle was WAY too cool for me to every be close friends with.  It seemed no matter where she was, people flocked to her.  When she wasn't around, people talked about her.  Last May I was looking at some fabric at Hobby Lobby.  I had somehow gotten Michelle's number.  I texted her to tell her this particular fabric was on sale and I thought she would love it.

Then, I hung out with her for the first time.  I found out later that Michelle's life was a bit chaotic.  See, her mom was battling cancer and her baby girl had a heart problem.  We sat on Michelle's couch and she asked me about life.  Michelle met me in a really difficult season- when lots of friends had moved away.  For the couple of hours I was there, it seemed like I was the only thing that mattered.  It's one of my favorite things about Michelle.  She lives life like a saying she has in her house:  "Wherever you're at, be all there".  I saw Michelle once or twice more over the next few months.

In January, she started discipling me.  Basically, that means she's super intentional about living life with me.  She's for me and she asks me the hard questions.  Usually, we hang out once a week.  It's a highlight.  The girl oozes life, joy, and the Holy Spirit.  I know that no matter what I tell her, she is for me.  I also never have to wonder where I stand with her, because she is such a good communicator.  She's direct and honest.  It makes me trust her all the more.  She asks me the really hard questions.  She doesn't let me get away with anything, but she is so kind about it.  A couple of weeks ago, I told some people, "It's really easy to hold someone's toes to the fire; it's much less easy to stand there and possibly get burned with them".  Michelle is one who stands with people.  She is loyal beyond loyal.  She's a great friend.  Oh, and if you're having a party- I PROMISE you want Michelle there.  She brings so much life and is SO fun to be around.

About a week ago, Michelle's mom was sent home from the hospital.  You can read the story on her blog Leachlove.  Her mom started hospice.  Michelle moved in.. because that's what Michelle does.  She stands with you and makes sure you know you aren't alone.  Yesterday, towards the end of saying good-bye to her mom, Michelle sent me a text asking about something that PALES in comparison.  Why?  Because Michelle doesn't live in comparison.  Michelle loves people well.

Today, Michelle said good-bye to her mom.  Tomorrow, Michelle will celebrate her mom's life on Mother's Day.  I can't even imagine how hard that is.  But here's a secret about Michelle:  she is extraordinarily brave. She wouldn't necessarily say that about herself.  In fact, when she reads this she'll probably think about all the times she feels like she's wavered.  But those who know her know the truth:  Michelle is brave because she has chosen to partner with the person of bravery, who is the Holy Spirit.  Michelle will stand there on Mother's Day and celebrate her mom, who is now in Heaven, because Michelle knows her best friend, the Holy Spirit, will be there to comfort and celebrate with her while God gets to dance with her mom.

So thankful that I get to call such a brave woman friend.